I’ve been on the verge of tears lately at the site of seemingly every beautiful thing I encounter.
Which is a little strange for me.
Because I can tell you this:
It’s not PMS. (too much information?)
And I’m for sure not normally someone to get teary eyed watching a sunset.
But, recently, all of these beautiful things are starting to set me off.
I saw a photograph of my dear love-ahs Lex & Josh today. He flew to her. All the way down in Honduras- just to see her face and be with her for a little short while. He so loves her. And at that encounter my throat choked up and my forehead crinkled. #whatishappeningtome?
I don’t work well past 10 o’clock usually. Especially if it’s anything to do with a deadline. Anytime past ten is when I lose all perspective on time and become convinced I can never EVER sleep again because I have entirely TOO MUCH elephant to eat (you know, eat the elephant one bite at a time?). Everything my mother ever taught me about eating elephants flies out the door when nighttime comes.
Tonight, I continued working past pumpkin hour on some LONG overdue prahm photos. Starting to recognize the heightened sense of irrationality over taking me, I felt myself becoming so unsatisfied with everything I was doing because,
it didn’t look like ___________’s photos. (and if no one ever told you, comparison KILLS)
At the peak of this dissatisfaction, I came to this photograph.
It stopped me in my tracks.
And my throat started to tighten up.
Because this photograph,
Freezes everything that she is to me.
This beautiful weathered soul that still radiates a thirst to LIVE and to love.
Undoubtedly she has been scarred and tossed around as we all have, but in this moment.
Even if just for a few seconds.
She was happy.
And her happiness brings life to me.
It always has.
One of the most loving and compassionate souls walking on this planet.
This is why I believe in what I do. To stop time for moments like this and forever freeze a loaded moment that flits to quick for you to be able to truly revel in all that it is. And to be honest, I’ve been loosing sight of it a lot lately.
With tears dripping down my face as I write this, I’m alright with it. I’m taking it as a sign that my heart is so longing to encounter deep, deep beauty and revel in it. So revel I will.
Thanks for the recalibration of heart Jesus.